I’m borrowing this phrase from Frozen because it’s perfect for the plan I’m putting into place this week. Plus, it’s so fun singing that part of the song: “men-tal syn-chro-ni-za-tion.” Admit it, you sang that line in your head, too, as you read this sentence! 😂
Last Tuesday I wrote a post about how bored, apathetic, and clingy my children have become as these long months of quarantine continue (my family hasn’t really broken out from lockdown for reasons I’ve already discussed on this blog). We’ve essentially been on a five-month “summer” fling filled with no-holds-barred playtime, iPad/TV/computer, pool (since June), jungle gym, snack grazing, and more iPad/TV/computer time. Standards have become far too lax over here—yes, I am 100% to blame for the sake of preserving my own mental health—but who could blame me? We’re all going stir-crazy and getting on each other’s nerves. My kids’ attitudes, demands, and expectations have become unbearable and unacceptable. They have no concept of boundaries, despite my daily efforts to teach this critical skill, and seem to believe my husband and I are here to cater to their every wish and whim. I’ve been sympathetic and understanding so far because these are unprecedented times beyond anyone’s control, and I appreciate my babies are just trying to cope. However, my patience and tolerance are rapidly waning.
I’ve been reflecting on this a lot the past few days and I realized just how much my kids flourish on routine and structure, neither of which have prevailed in our house since schools closed in mid-March. My son would be content to play with his Lego dinosaurs all day long—he has quite the vivid imagination when it comes to his T-Rex and Indominus Rex—but my daughter craves stability, consistency, and brain stimulation. Of course, my son could benefit from this form of discipline, too.
It’s time for a change. So, starting today, I’m instituting two structured activities each Monday through Friday:
- “Learning hour,” during which my children will focus on their ABCs, math, reading, and writing; and
- “Mindfulness matters,” during which they will retire to their bedrooms for about 30 minutes or so to color, read, play, or simply rest. I told them they could do whatever they want as long as they are quiet, stay separated, and keep their doors closed.
The last time I tried this mindfulness technique—back in March—my daughter emerged after only 13 minutes, LOL, so this week should be interesting. I know it will be an adjustment, but I believe it’s important for them to have this “alone” time. Once they get used to it, I’m hoping it will improve moods and, as a result, our family relationships, which I’m sorry to say are strained beyond belief. (Daily pool time seems to be helping a lot, though, I must say. We all get exercise, sun, and quality family time and it usually puts us all in a good mood.)
I’m also hoping this “experiment” will prepare us for when homeschooling starts in September. Yes, you read that correctly: We decided this week to do full-time virtual learning for both kids. It was an insanely difficult decision that we did not take lightly. We weighed all our options (outside of our fears and anxieties), asked our kids’ opinions, and made what we feel is the best decision for our family. And now, we’re owning it. At this point, we can only move forward from here, so I’d like to think making some small adjustments to our daily routines now will make the transition back into schooling a lot more seamless come September. Maybe that’s wishful thinking on my part but I’m gonna run with it and see what shakes out. And if it doesn’t work, at least I can say I tried.
I’ve also been toying with the idea of eliminating my children’s nightly TV show before bedtime in favor of oh, I don’t know, something quiet and relaxing. I think I’m going to hold off on that, though. Baby steps. I don’t want to overwhelm them with too many changes and, selfishly, in so doing I would also be punishing myself and my husband: We like to use that time for our own relaxation and reading pleasure. That said, if attitudes around here don’t change … momma will be forced to reassess her options, and no one wants that, least of all my children. 😊
That’s where we stand as of right now. I’m going to put this plan into action for the next week and then circle back here with my results. Fingers crossed we’re able to bring some consistency and normalcy back into our days (and that I have the patience and mental stamina to see it through!). I honestly believe it will benefit all of us.
If anyone reading has tried implementing something like this, please, please let me know about your experience! What measures did you take? Did/do they work? Do you have any other ideas/suggestions to share? Perhaps some dos and don’ts? If you’d prefer to yell, scream, and holler at me for being a crazy loon, feel free to do that, too! Perhaps I need someone to hammer some sense into me; I did admit, after all, that my sanity has taken a beating over these long, long, months.
Either way, friends, I’m all ears.