Success: The achievement of something desired, worked for or the gaining of fame or wealth.
That’s the definition listed in Webster’s New World College Dictionary. Agree or disagree?
I came across this word/topic recently and I’ve been thinking about it a lot given what’s happening in our society and financial markets thanks to the global coronavirus pandemic. It’s certainly putting everyone’s life into perspective and forcing us to reimagine a whole new way of living. And maybe even what it means to be a “success.” I know society’s opinion on the matter; it defines everything by money, power, and status. But none of that means much today, does it? Because this virus is 100% equal opportunity.
So, how do I define success?
Well, when I look back on my life so far, here’s what I see:
- A respectable, lucrative career;
- Rewarding personal and professional relationships;
- No debt;
- More than a decade spent traveling, exploring every inch of the incomparable Big Apple (in all her beautiful glory), and following Josh Groban on tour (haha, couldn’t resist!);
- A wonderful husband, two kids, and a nice, safe place to call home; and
- Other gratifying accomplishments, such as being president of a local moms club, rediscovering my passion for writing and creating a personal blog, and rejoining the workforce at a local insurance agency.
By anyone’s standards, I was (and am) living the American dream. A success story for sure. And yet, it never feels like enough. (Did I just write that?!) Why? Because nothing is ever enough these days. We need to be and do everything for everyone. It’s not enough to have an education, a career, a family, an artistic passion, a unique talent, a business, money, power, status. We must be more, do more, have more. Society constantly hammers this point home. And everyone buys into it for fear of looking weak or unmotivated or a failure, or of being judged. It’s exhausting and disheartening.
But then I look at where we are now.
We’ve been living under quarantine for more than a week, with no end date in sight. All schools and universities are closed. The financial markets are tanking. Businesses everywhere are shutting down. The government is in shambles. Thousands are sick and dying. People are living in fear and paranoia. Where are society’s “success” stories now? All our being and doing mean nothing in the end. I’m not trying to be dramatic or cynical or jaded. Just the opposite, in fact.
Because with all this chaos comes opportunity. A chance to slow down and observe; to sit outside in the sun, go on a family hike, or maybe even fly a kite (that’s what my kids and husband have been doing); to read a book (or two or three); to meditate or pray; to take up a new hobby like knitting or painting; to do whatever it is that makes you happy and relieves your mental load. And to make quality time for what matters most: our loved ones. It’s not a coincidence that Zoom is suddenly the word on everyone’s lips. Right now, it’s the only way to interact with our loved ones and that’s what we crave most in times of need.
So, what does success look like to me? Peace, stability, love and family, and no regrets.
I don’t think of death often—especially my own—but when the death toll from an unknown, scary, fatal virus is constantly in your face, it’s kinda hard not to go there. And when it does cross my mind, I don’t see status, wealth, or power. All I see is my family. As long as they’re by my side and the depths of our love know no bounds, I can rest eternally knowing my life was the absolute pinnacle of success.