A Snow-Day Conspiracy

It’s a (insert expletive of your choice) conspiracy!

When I decided to put my son in preschool a few months back, I had my schedule all worked out. My daughter would attend school every weekday except Thursday. Why did I give her a day off? I don’t know, I guess I was in a good mood the day I submitted her school forms. And then, starting this past January, my son would go to school every Tuesday and Thursday. It was the perfect solution for all of us: I would get one glorious four-hour morning to myself each week and then one day for each of my kids for some much-needed mommy/son and mommy/daughter time.

But you know the saying about plans: “Man Plans, and God laughs.” It’s so true!

It’s mid-February now and not once have I been able to enjoy a Tuesday of solitude—or at least my kind of solitude. Life just seems to get in the way. The first Tuesday I allowed myself some latitude and paced around my house waiting for school to call and tell me that my son was having a meltdown and needed to be picked up. That call never came, thankfully. (He has adjusted to preschool beautifully.) OK, so maybe that was a version of “solitude,” but I had promised myself that Tuesdays would be a day of no chores, cleaning, laundry, cooking, errands, or any of the other stay-at-home BS I handle every day. Instead I would do something strictly for myself, like writing or reading or breakfast with a girlfriend or even a massage or manicure. Yeah, right. The rest of my Tuesday mornings have been a blur of kindergarten paperwork, sick children, vacation research/planning, event planning for my Moms Club, and sick children.

Now, maybe you are thinking how wonderful it must have been to handle all this business without kids underfoot. And you would be right. But I promised myself a morning of freedom every week, to clear my head and recharge my batteries. And if I’m going to keep a promise to anyone, it should be to myself, right?! So, today, I planned to get up, send the kids off to school, and spend four magnificent hours writing, writing, writing. Nothing could possibly take this time away from me. I’ve been fighting a cold since Friday so I’ve been trying to take it easy (as much as any mother can), we handled our errands, including grocery shopping and laundry, over the weekend, and I literally had nothing to do today other than work on my blog. It was the perfect plan! And there’s that word again.

I woke up happy and content this morning, knowing that in a few hours I would be blissfully free. But then my husband came back into our bedroom and rudely burst my beautiful bubble! Our morning ritual is coffee in bed while we read. Because when else would we ever be allowed to read when our house sounds like a hoard of wild banshees lives here most of the time. Since I’ve been sick, my husband has oh so lovingly been taking the bullet and doing our morning coffee runs (another little piece of heaven to me)! Anyways, upon his return, he informed me that schools have been closed.

WTF. Another Solitary Tuesday in the toilet!

You see what I’m saying? It must be a conspiracy! A snow day on any other day of the week would be fine. Just.Not.Tuesday. And yet…here we are. Oh, and to top it all off, my daughter woke early today and is currently sitting next to me in bed. So not only do I not get my free morning, I get to start “mothering” extra early. Strike two! Now all I need is for my kids to fight like cats and dogs all day and the conspiracy will be complete.

After I whined and moaned to my husband about how unfair this is for approximately 10 minutes, I figured I should—begrudgingly—act like an adult and look for the silver lining. So, I thought, and I thought, and I thought (as Winnie the Pooh might think) and here it is…drum roll please…OK, I got nothing. Alright fine, my silver lining would be letting the kids go outside on the deck to play in the snow. For, surely, if we have a snow day from school then there must be snow outside, right? Or maybe some ice? Hell, I would even take frost or fog at this point. Wrong! That’s right, folks, there ain’t a speck of snow or ice or frost on the ground and yet schools are closed. Apparently, the snow is “supposed” to start around 8 a.m. Awesome sauce. Thanks husband, thanks for always keeping me informed.

I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised by this, but I honestly didn’t think schools would be closed today. Ah well, c’est la vie. I guess I’ll just have to put on my grown-up hat and deal. So, while my kids bounce off the walls jolly as Ole Saint Nick because there’s no school, I will be here playing chef, kitchen wench, cleaning lady, referee, entertainment director, and hygienist. You know, business as usual around here. All the while crying on the inside.

*Sigh*

Although, who knows? Maybe I’ll be wrong and today will turn into one of those magical memories I’m always talking about. Maybe. If I can get my brain and body into that mindset. I’ll keep you all posted.

For now, though, please excuse me while I go cry and wallow for a bit over my luscious (and second) cup of joe.